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I think about dying everyday

from Eight of Swords by you,yourself

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lyrics

I used to hold paper bags over my head and the first time was for 2 seconds. The next time it was 5 and it kept going until I reached the point that my mouth would say goodbye and I would be so close but I kept stopping and stopping and I just felt so useless like I couldn't even kill myself right. I don't talk to anyone here so I talk to my dog a lot. I used to cry on the floor with him and just wish for death and it scares me to think how many times I have actually wished for death. I know it's nothing special and I know I'm nothing special but I just want to make something important for someone out there. I want to die and give away parts of me to fill someone else. I want to make someone feel the passion I've always wanted to feel and it's so painful to know I can't. It really hurts that I can not breathe. I am in water, I am waiting for my mouth to say goodbye and sometimes it doesn't even say that. Sometimes I just want to go with no goodbye because who would say it back. If god is real he wouldn't say it, I know he wouldn't because I would be able to see him for eternity. If he isn't real then there is nothing for me and I will have lived as nothing and died for nothing but sometimes it just gets to the point where I have to push myself deeper into the water because I know I am meant for more but I don't know if that more is here or not.

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from Eight of Swords, released January 10, 2017

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you,yourself Memphis, Tennessee

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