I don't wanna be alone

from Eight of Swords by you,yourself

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lyrics

I spend more hours searching online is god real? is there an afterlife? More than I spend time with humans. I search for god but I don't search for it in others. I don't watch myself grow, I watch myself sink and I watch myself cry and I watch myself watching myself live in this horrible search engine in my head. I think I use death as a coping mechanism for my loneliness. I realize that I will die just as any other flower melts away but I won't accept the fact that I will never exist again. I feel so alone in this lifetime that if I were to die my entire existence would have never mattered in the first place. The food I ate, the shoulders I've brushed, the doors I have opened will never matter. It's crazy to think you could pass someone on the road the day they die and you will never remember them again. I'd like to think there is a god and I'd like to think we don't die alone but there is no evidence and there will never be any evidence and we can spend our entire lives wishing for the best or we can spend time with others who love you but it's really hard for me because I do not feel loved and I will always feel alone.

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from Eight of Swords, released January 10, 2017

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you,yourself Memphis, Tennessee

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